Monday, November 30, 2009

From The Files Of The Cave Of Cool - 33

Off To The Jungle They Go

My sister is the hippy adventurer in our family. I will willingly join the Justice League to save the planet but if there are bugs around or I gotta get wet or stung by something in the water then I am less happy about the whole situation. My fear of things that tend to brush up against my leg in the waters is well documented on my site. Call me crazy but I also think you should wear shoes in the jungle. That just the kind of nonconformist I am.

Case in point my Sister is taking my also shoeless neice and nephew to Cape Tribulation, one of the most remote and beautiful rainforests in the world. Its not far from where they live in Queensland, Australia. I did some research and found this article about a similar traveler and thought I would share three pictures with my Cave of Coolness audience.

The place certainly looks remote and beautiful but I wouldn't be sleeping ONE WINK. See if you can figure out why. Scenes like these would freak ME out and have me be tying rope around the kids all the time to keep them safe and near me at all times. She of course will just give them a sharpened stick to go play with the jungle spiders.

Another reason the gods choose to leave me childless. I would have no problem letting them wear a 'power ring' but will also insist on warm socks and mittens both of which are not often available while fighting on other planets.

He Made Bunny Cry Again

I plan to be quite pissed off at Obama for continuing to send troops to Afghanistan when he makes that expected announcement tomorrow evening. More blood and treasure will flow into an unwinable situation and it will not even gain the President the political advantage and support he thinks it will bring him from the right. They will instead chastise Obama for waiting too long and 'waffling' about a decision he should have made weeks ago. Instead of searching for an honorable way to bring those brave young men and women home to their families, he puts more of them in harm's way. I hate these moments when a man who could have been a transformative figure in our world turns out to be just another politician. I especially hate, however, how dumb I was for hoping he could be something different. It only takes one man to lead the revolution and only one to stop it dead in its tracks.

More Equiptment For The Cave Of Cool

Like the giant key used to open the door to Superman's 'Fortress of Solitude', I am always on the lookout for something stylish to make MY Cave THE Coolest Cave in the World. Today I saw this story and I think I have found my new front door. I love articles on the best pieces of design by young architects. The door alone to this diamond merchant’s residence in Surat, India, was judged good enough to make it one of the four prize winners this year. What was good enough for those judges is good enough for me.

Vitruvian Hulk

Sweet looking image based on an old concept. Da Vinci never goes out of style and like all great icons, the hulk fits right in.

Hell Yeh, Pluto Is A Planet

If Mars and Venus are still planets after what they have done (and they KNOW what they have done) then Pluto, who just is back there minding its own business, deserves to be in the club. It's all a popularity contest anyways with Saturn being a dickhead planet. And how can you look at those sad eyes of Pluto and deny him. Even tipsie Uranus understands that much. ONE Solar System Bitches! Viva Pluto!

Speaking of something cool, check out these graphics to gain a better understanding of the orbits of the planets in our Solar System.

First Look - Iron Man 2

I am loving that look of 'War Machine' in the background. Robots make 'boom boom', hell yeh.

Just Fabulous

Add this to the list of things (like sheep shearing) that I can watch all day long and then some.

2 More Years In The Miami Sun

The USA network has officially announced that there will be a fourth season of one of my favorite shows - 'Burn Notice'. We can expect the second half of season 3 to air in January. Talk about a great X-Mas gift. I could tell you that if you are not watching this show then you are missing out but I hate that when anyone tells it to me and I am always embarrassed when I see that they were right all along later down the line. So save yourself the embarrassment and download what you haven't seen. I watched the first two years over one glorious week this summer and I know the joy you will be having catching up with this totally original show. Its the dumbest comment ever but shows like this are WHY TVs are made.

Red Cliff

I have a great love for Chinese historical epics. The sheer spectacle that the filmakers are able to put on screen is testament to the richness of Chinese History and culture. But its also their skill as storytellers and technicians (who are unfortunately virtually unknown to us in the west) that make their movies an untapped treasure. I figure that since they eventually will take over everything it would benefit us in the west to absorb some of their culture besides egg rolls and fortune cookies.

Director John Woo is one who has worked with both Hollywood and the grindhouses of the Hong Kong film industry so you would expect him to attack Chinese history with both eastern style and western flare. He certainly shows here why he is considered one of the world's great filmakers.

I do not expect English translations and can live with subtitles easily when I watch these films but I wish sometimes they would give us in the West a bit more background so we can understand the reasons for the struggles the characters are put under. I get that one king's army is trying to usurp the rule of a brother or an uncle. I just need a point of view to follow. Who should I be rooting for? Without that conflict this is nothing more than a primer on ancient Chinese battle strategies. The English trailers brought me more up to speed than anything the movie initially gave me.

I understand the entire epic was cut down from more than 4 hours to 2.5 hours for the western release. Knowing the film would be aired in the west required much more attention from the editing to what we expect from a film. The epic battle scenes sell the movie alone but give me a hero to root for and people to care about.

The whole time I was watching 'Red Cliff', I keep thinking how perfectly and brilliantly Shakespearean 'The Curse of the Golden Flower' was because it gave both eastern and western style storytelling to enjoy. We not only got a spectacle like few before seen on screen but a brilliantly acted drama about a royal family on the edge of decay. It was the perfect blend.

I also recommend 'House of Flying Daggers' and of course 'Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon' if you can suspend your disbelief and just enjoy two great action adventure movies.

There are some very cool characters in 'Red Cliff' who individually fight amazing battles and portray the kind of honor that strongly appeals to the character of the Chinese people. There are also spectacular battle scenes, particularly one involving Chinese river boats and flaming arrows that can't be missed. I only wish I had been give more of a reason for my involvement in the waring factions and insight into their motivations. I would be interested in seeing the entire epic the way the director intended it to be seen.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Cool Avengers Poster - The Ladies

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Fighting Evil With Style


Lisa figured that if she was going to fight evil, it wouldn't hurt to do it with some style.
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Moment Of Truth


It was at this moment, that Jan truly realized the difference between good and evil. Timmy may have been her blood but in all ways that mattered he was no longer her brother. To the creatures who respected peace between those who lived above the ocean and those who lived below it, he would forever be TIMMY, THE EVIL OCTOPUS KING. She understood that one day it would fall to her to end his reign of terror and return honor to her family's name. (Thanks to Dr. Monkey for filling in the gaps to this tragic family legend)
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No One Does Mystique Like Mayhew

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Why Didn't I Think Of This First - It Just Writes Itself

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It's All Over


It seems that 'Twilight - New Moon' has made over 200 million dollars at the weekend box office. Check your bibles. That IS one of the signs of the 'end of days'. I used to think that the greatest threat to my sanity and safety were these Cephalopods I am wrong about that. With only a single edged blade I can fight and kill these boneless bastards at will. However, how can I live in a world where what represents the ideal man is a shirtless, hairless wolfchild or a pastie faced glittery emo sissy boy? The world has changed before our eyes fellas and we aren't wanted or needed anymore. Unless of course a tire needs changing or a spider needs killing. But then again, Lana is around to vacuum all those arachnids up so what the hell good am I to anyone? Sure, I am witty and urbane with a passable genius intellect but ITS NOT ENOUGH ANYMORE. I refuse to sparkle or glitter like Adam Lambert. The Cave of Coolness will always be a refuge for you, my brothers. Don't forget your 'Snuggies' because we have a bit of a draft but the beer and whiskey are cold and I got lots of bratwurst on the BBQ. There is always a Bond movie, a Bruce Willis actioner or something starring Yul Bryner on the big screen so I figure we can hold out till summer when Iron Man comes back onscreen.
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Surprised Kitty

Almost As Cool As Calvin's Canadian Cave Of Coolness


He got me beat with that fantastic 'Skull Throne' since the jungle would naturally be a better source for human skulls than the civilized prairies of Western Canada. And really, you also can't compete with that mood lighting. Fabulous!
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Rom - Wicked Cool Spaceknight

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